DC Makeup Artist KiKi L'Italien

The dirt was flying through the air. Hair mussed and still somehow falling in a heroic/attractive way (how can hair do that?), the leading man stepped forward and growled, "They call him the..."

Wait a second. Wait just...one...second. Did you see that?!? What was that blinding light? His teeth? His TEETH?!? How could teeth possibly be that white? Are they real? They look real...Jesus, they must glow in the dark. Do you think someone could ever have teeth that white while fighting in a war?

Time out.

People, I love beauty. I am all for adding a little tweak here, a little filler there, but how far before it is too far?

You want to know something? I used to be drawn to men with gorgeous teeth. Even if they were a little crooked or imperfect in some small way, as long as they had an attractive shape and were clean, white, and sparkly; I was a goner. But this thing with teeth being so blindingly white that one can find their way in the dark with them has got to end. There is nothing sexy to me about fakey-fake-fake-fake whiter than white teeth.

Actors who are supposed to be in war don't necessarily have to have rotten, grody teeth; but help me keep my suspension of disbelief lifted by not having actors with teeth so white they could beacon for help from the ground by grinning.

That is all.